Truth Tuesday: Get Off Your High Twitter Horse


When Peter Griffin started the, ” you-know-what-really-grinds my gears” segment on family guy, I couldn’t help but marvel at the idea of being able to vent like he did..(in my case, anonymously) and be able to have the opportunity for people to read and perhaps agree and/or diss me as is the norm on any Nigerian website comments nowadays. So, shout out to Jaguda for creating the medium for me to do so…and anonymously too.

Now to what grinds my gears…you know what really grinds my gears, People feeling themselves on Twitter. Sure one can argue that the basic idea of twitter centers around self and as a result, feeds on egocentricity, but like everything in this world, too much of something can easily becomes a bad thing. Being that I am Nigerian, majority of my friends/followers on twitter are also Nigerians, and if I must add some of them have really taken the twitter craze to the next level. Even those that you know personally, have a completely different life on twitter…, One time, a friend of mine who complained of how broke she was and how much of a hard time she was having, tweeted hours later about being in Lenox mall (any one who is familiar with Lenox, knows its a high end mall almost always filled with celebrities) and was torn between what “very famous designer” shoe to purchase. She even accompanied the tweet with pictures, asking her followers to help her with the decision… as she finally settled on one after so many comments. Of course I knew it was a lie as I knew at that point she couldn’t buy a happy meal to save her life. So really, why the fronting? Its not like anyone really cares if you can buy the shoes or not…must you delve into unnecessary lies to seek attention on twitter?

Another is the twitter bully, because they won a verbal back and forth on twitter, gained a little bit of notoriety, as a result, more amebos..err…I mean followers. These particular dumb breed irks me the most. Although I follow a select few of these goons (all females, if I might add), you can always bet on them to be in a tweet beef, “sharpening mouth” and throwing punches. Being that I know these shameless young girls, I know that in reality its the reverse. They pick on everyone, talk smack and @ them, making everyone believe they have “balls”. It’s a shame really that these few sold shame, for disgrace.

And to the ones who happen to have an unbalanced ratio of followers – following, favoring the follower side. These special breed of people adopt the idea of what I call a false elevated sense of self importance. They begin to think because they somehow have well over 400 followers, they appoint themselves as twitter’s president, and chief of police. They believe each and every 140 or less character from them is worth gold and everyone must listen and pay attention. God forbids if anyone goes against their opinion and disagrees, with them….you would be punished with “@’s” and RT (re-tweets) from them and a few of their faithful supporters club who also have aided them in the false realization of celebrity they think they have achieved through twitter. A few Nigerian DJ’s are very well guilty of these… since I am anonymous, I shall also respect them and not name names, but I’m sure they know themselves.

Some way or the other we all seek attention on twitter, but you cannot help but notice those who constantly try hard in seeking attention that it becomes a problem. From the people who constantly talk about their sexual prowess to the brazen ones who lost all sense of modesty by twitpic-ing pictures of their half naked mushroom looking self, to the comedians who try hard to prove that they are funny, but come out as just plain annoying, and to the twitter groupie who stalks/@’s every celebrity whether Nigerian or international. Lest I forget, the lip pouting, boob squeezing, ass pushing, bad weaved girls who constantly tweets and re-tweets the MI’s and don jazzy or Joe Schmoes with uber number of followers in hopes that she too can graduate and become the twitter whore that boasts many followers. You guys need to chill and calm the f*&k down, its damn right embarrassing and quite frankly awkward for some of us. You really don’t have to overdo it and be easy, its just twitter….not reality or a measure of achievement. Abeg, stop trying too hard.

And that people, is what really grinds my gears… Drop a comment… Catch the next Truth Tuesday. Peace.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this column “Truth Tuesday” does not express the views of but rather the views of the particular individual writing the article. Thanks.


  1. Omg I luv it! Its so spot on, will u marry me one babe like that? Lol but on a serious note, wat u sed is exactly d things dat grind my gears, I jst became a fan

  2. Really good article. I could picture a lot of twitter handles as i read the article. Weaklings in real life and heroes on twitter.

  3. soooo true!! love this article.
    it really is embarrasing, and i tend to feel sorry for these people. they are trying to achieve on twitter what they cannot achieve in life.

  4. Haha @ goons.

    You speak the truth. The inflated sense of self amongst regular jane's/joe's and even celebs is quite annoying i must say. Plus the stans..oops i mean followers that get into the "let me at em'" state of mind all in the name of defending a celeb are obviously jobless.

    I've come to the conclusion that twitter is the devil.

    Enough said.

    Great article.

  5. I don't know what happened , my initial comment was deleted…sigh..

    Haha @ goons. Legit article.

    Plus twitter is the devil. Enough said.

  6. Spot on. People treat twitter like it’s real life. Whoever wrote this deserves an award… By the way, I’m feeling this truthful tuesday thing u guys got going on.

  7. Twitter is REAL LIFE. The writer didn't even tell us the category she belongs to. I'm sure she's in one of those that really grind my gears.

  8. Spot on! Twitter is full of pathetic low lifers who thnk being fake of mean is d ish! They kip me entertained and thankful 4 my life! :D…I love twirra!

  9. LOL. This is spot on. It's funny how some people will get offended by this, but know it's true and cant say much. Like i've always said. Twitter gives people an exaggerated sense of self-importance

  10. As we go say on Twitter, Gbamations Chapter 5, vs. 6. Preach it, girl! Twitter definitely has it's fair share of characters. It's like mmmkay.

    The following annoy me:
    1. Those 'I must be funny' by force types. Okay, we've established that you are the local comedian and every now and then, we will even 'LOL' at some things you say but jeez, some of them be doing the most sha. Even a simple tweet like 'now eating lunch' musto turn into a grand occasion. It's like chile, you aren't fooling anyone sha. I guess folks will do anything for some @ mentions with 'LWKM' and what have you?

    2. Teamfollowback. What exactly is this? I think that it's quite embarrassing to be running up and down talking about 'now ff, please ff back'. Why should I? This 'followership' business is not by force sha o. Or those folks who unfollow you because you're not following back. So the main reason why you followed me, was to up your list of followers? I don't get it but ah well…

    3. Awon subliminal tweeters. Abegi, if you have something to say just @ the person. I can't get with sub tweets. I think they are kinda cowardly.

    etc etc.
    in general, people should just tweet. It doesn't have to be a grand and fancy occasion. Some times e be like say people dey google what to tweet sef…you'd be surprised.

  11. May God bless you sooo much for this post. U’re so on
    Point. Its quite annoying when ppl try so hard to be the shit on twitter. They keep me roflmao tho, very lame ass ppl. Great article!

  12. Very true. Pisses me off seeing people living fake lives on twitter. e.g. some guy was like, iJust want a 1200 GBP camera when its actually about 500 GBP but i'M like why are you even referrring to the price in the first place.? :s


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