First of all,thanks for the comments on EXCUSES….AGAIN? STOP PLEASE which was the series before this. Ok, now here I come again, that you’ve been in a long term relationship does not mean you should continually stay in it. Unfortunately for some ladies, it takes a while to see the light and muster up courage to get out of a bad situation. But when you see the light; RUN, GO, your life deserves it. If you don’t make that change, you’ll never know what’s out there? And when I say out there, I don’t mean what’s out there in another relationship; I mean what’s out there in you that you are yet to discover. Some of you ladies are afraid – afraid that you might not be married by a certain time.
A few weeks back, a Sierra Leonean friend of mine who is engaged and with a proposed wedding date and plans already in the pipeline called me. She called me occasionally since she has moved up north to be close to her man, so we often try to steal each other’s attention with lengthy hour calls,(thank God for my unlimited calling plan)but on this one phone call, things were pretty bad. She sounded pissed off; grouchy, upset, disappointed and unhappy that she was marrying this guy. So I asked her why she was still going on with this engagement and a proposed future wedding if she felt the marriage wouldn’t work out. She said to me that she did not want the last six years of her life spent with him go to waste. Hmmm! When she said this, I stared at my phone because I couldn’t look at her (she was in a different city) and in that instant I felt like having a private jet – I would have flown to her city quickly to give her a knock on her head, just a gentle knock – to help tilt her brain back to the center of her skull, because obviously it seemed out of range with the crappy words she just uttered.
Let’s think about this, You are willing to screw up the next 50 years of your life, create babies in a hostile environment with a man you despise thereby screwing up also the next generation, raising kids that would need constant features on Dr Phil and therapy sessions for the rest of their lives based on the abuse they will experience in that home, all because you don’t want the last six years of your life – 1,2,3,4,5,6 – to mean nothing (I’m having a headache just rehashing her laments). So you are trying to create a love marriage from a six years crappy relationship?Needless to say, this lady is a young beautiful,intelligent 26yrs old chemist. With good life habits like hers, I mean good diet, no drugs or cigarettes she could easily live another healthy 50-55 years .And here you are, willing to mortgage a future on six years already spent with this jerk? Seriously, I can see it is really tough but as her friend I couldn’t hesitate to let her see she is probably desperately trying to make something out of nothing.
Sometimes we allow fear to dictate what we should do. We will never get from fear what love has to offer. Love is bold, confident and fearless. Why are you scared? Why are you letting fear keep you in a relationship that you know you don’t want? Why do you want to marry a guy who has already made you feel like trash? Ok, so you are more concerned about looking good and successful on the outside at the expense of how you truly feel on the inside. Sometimes, we don’t believe in ourselves, so we settle and then try to make something out of nothing.
TO BE CONTINUED