More often than not, you meet a young Nigerian babe in her early twenties and the only thing on her mind is “God please take away all this stupid, ‘yeye’, small boys from my path and bless me with a fine man, senior partner in shell or chevron any one would do, a nice house in lekki, phase I or phase II or even banana island am not too picky, with a master’s degree , well mature, grown and not on a ‘junior boy level’ “ .ARE YOU KIDDING ME !? There is a real good reason God hasn’t answered your prayers. Are you Mrs. Right do you think you are ready for a man who is set for life a man who has accomplished the “Nigerian dream” a man who can die happy. You need to assess yourself and ask “can I really handle a MR RIGHT?” Supposing you pray to God a million and one times a day for the perfect man and God being the merciful lord that he is grants you the perfect man, the whole package a man who would take you shopping and say “baby go crazy with my credit card” a man who would love you beyond life itself and you are Mrs. Carp, you are whinny, immature, arrogant, illiterate and every other thing that can possible be wrong with a young woman. What happens next? Mr. Right leaves you, find Mrs. Maybe and you are left all alone, cursing at the world asking God why he didn’t give you Mr. Right, well he gave you Mr. Right but were you ready? That is the real question.
As a young woman trying to find a man, you need to specify what you want with discretion. You don’t need a man with 3 houses, or a mansion, why are you asking God for a man with a private jet? Can you fly one? And why on earth are you asking for somebody that has an island. Most girls ask “why do you want me to lower my values to find a man?” Girl, that one is not values oh! Or standards, that one is corporate theft because “Na thief you be! “. I mean If you are young, in college and you are not dying any time soon, you need to be asking for a guy that would love you, support you, help you advance intellectually, am talking about a guy you can grow with , not the one that you would have to tip toe around because you guys are not comfortable around each other , a type of guy that the two of you can see movies, go clubbing and share significant time for each other , and you never know Mr. right now, may eventually turn to Mr. right.
But if you Get a more mature and let’s say a perfect guy , that has a full-time job , works from 9am to 9pm, is always in one conference or the other , but loves you all the same , is stupidly rich and spends all the money on you . he is right up there and you are so low compared to his maturity, as a young woman you will feel that you are well equipped to handle such a relationship but you are wrong, you are to have the emotionally immature to keep up with such a relationship. Of course he is eventually going to leave you because you are a mooch , he is not gaining anything from you and there are millions of more mature women that have earned themselves a ‘perfect’ man like him . You need to STOP looking for the wrong thing in a man and the Wrong man would STOP finding you.
You hear a lot of women using the same phrase “guys around my age are too young for me” but then if you see a guy you that is ‘omo baba olowo’ (has a rich parent) he suddenly becomes you ideal man. You need to look for people who have ambition, and a means of attaining their goals. But on the other hand if you a looking for a ‘Maga’ find Maga now, let him pay your way through college and buy you the flashiest things, but remember, you can’t eat your cake and have it, would ‘maga’ marry you?, ‘boys don dey sharp up’, be rest assured that he is using you as much as you are using him. So girls do you self a service, work hard for your money and work hard for the type of man you want to end up with. Once you’ve laid the right foundation it doesn’t take too long to get what you want. Don’t wait for anybody to give you what you can get yourself, Grow up with your man, and when you’ve reached a level where you feel he is becoming stagnant or has no passion then you can move of to man who has earned you, but if he is at your pace, the love is there and you guys have so much fun, then what are you looking for Mr. right for? , When he is right in front of you. Now he might be Mr. “please pick your underwear from the floor” or Mr. “why won’t you raise the toilet seat before you pee” but when you have a good man who is growing and maturing with you with time he would definitely be MR. RIGHT.
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