Nigerian Men Ain’t Shit


Where do I start from? It’s been a very long second since I took time to write out an article. More so, I have (and been) delayed in posting due to my ever busy schedule and forgetfulness. Mind you, this is the end of the semester and it’s the most busy period for some of us. Nevertheless, I take pride in sharing my thoughts and always pleasant theories in writing. Thus a couple of days ago, I came to the conclusion that Nigerian men ain’t shit. The American “ain’t “ makes it sound a lot cooler or hot depending on how you like to dish out your meals. No, I find Nigerian men very annoying.

When I think about Nigerian men I remember the words of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.  Wolves in sheep clothing they are. When I  think about Nigerian men I think about thorns and tussles. Not only are they oblivious to romance but they are also very proud and conniving. You could be married to a Nigerian man today and it is at his point of death you will get to hear that he has a few love children. Nigerian men? Nigerian men like to eat they cake and have it. They like to toast and break eggs when you are not just ready for “breakfast” and call you mannerless for farting in their car. Hmm! Nigerian men are the 7th cousins of chameleons and as a matter of certainty, chameleons are better than them. At least you can vouch for chameleons… You know they can change colour but Nigerian men? *inserts Yimu face* .  A disloyal Yoruba breed, a controlling  Igbo man or a deceitful womanising and dishonest Urhobo man or liability of a Bini man! Nigerian men  come in different shapes and sizes but they have one thing in common: they are Nigerian men. And that on its own is a problem. These men don’t call their own “baby” but when they marry from another culture entirely they remember to call her sweety, baby, pumpkin, antelope and every possible pet name our beyond great grandfather Adam could have possibly invented. Nigerian men want to enjoy the benefits of the west but scream tradition when things do not go their way. They find the slightest reason to cheat. “Oh one grain of salt is missing in my stew!? Evil woman! I’m cheating on you”. Yes Nigerian men give me headache. Both home and abroad, they are still Nigerian men and they give every sense of the word headache.

Now… What exactly did I just sound like? If “absurd” was a proper adjective, I would use it to describe my mini tirade in the previous paragraph. But it was tad bit more than absurd.  I find a few things very petrifying to my thought process. One of these things happens to be stereotypes. It wasn’t until I got exposed to social media that I began forming certain stereotypes about particular tribes. I’ll speak for Nigeria because it is my homeland and I’ve been in contact with enough Nigerians to know what to expect when I meet one. I reiterate more often than always that how you think can either make or break you and the situations you find yourself in.  I find very disturbing the rate at which few Nigerians have taken to popular platforms to showcase their baseless  assumptions on the opposite gender. In doing so we Nigerian men and women are causing more discord in an already divided population. Ça ne se fait pas!

If there is anything I have come to understand in the past couple of months of being in medical school, that would be that stereotypes and prejudice are a part of human nature and as such they cannot be totally eradicated. Our society has been plagued with the belief that discord is the very equal of peace. If I were to say that I want a Nigerian community where we consider ourselves as one, then I would be reaching for perfection which is a nonexistent noun in today’s world. More so, looking at Nigeria as a whole is like looking at a set of dominoes: one touched stone is the fall of another. Thus looking at how Nigerian men and women have decided to depreciate the value of their opposite counterpart gives room for tribalism which gives way to political and ethical misunderstandings and etcetera. Eventually what we get is a society where our children get to hear that Yoruba men are no good because they just aren’t. This is not right in anyway whatsoever.

What then do we do? A good old books once said “he that keepeth his mouth, keepeth his life”. Are you going to die for stereotyping the opposite gender? Hopefully not. I’ve always been of the opinion that doing damage control is the best way to handle a thing that is on the loose. Coming to a platform where everyone can hear you talk and downgrading your fellow Nigerian man/woman is unacceptable, in my candid opinion.

The bottom line of the matter is this: Nigerian men and women need each other. To be quite frank with you, it is only a Nigerian man that knows how to handle a Nigerian woman and her abnormal antiques. Though I get to hear so many disastrous stories of young women unknowingly dating married men with kids, I plead innocence till proven guilty. A Nigerian woman is the only one capable of being Ada Ada and Caro at the same time if given the chance to. I am always left maniacally bewildered at the amount of ignorance that makes airwaves while prolific writers, like myself, are left to lament on blogs about this topic. It’s not even about the jokes. Some people actually take these “bants” very seriously and use comedy to hide their pain. This leaves me very much concerned. How will our future generation reason if we are already downgrading our very own at this age of humanitarian advancement?

Now have I ever said that Nigerian men are all the same? Yes. Do I believe they are all the same? No.

Nigerian women this… Nigerian men that. We are all yabbing ourselves as if we won’t end up marrying each other.

With that being said,

You can slice my neck now…. Figuratively that is.

– The Alpha Female
CEO of



  1. Most Nigerian men are terrible. I am married to one. This man has ruined my life. I have bruises all over my arms and back. I don’t know why God brought this guy to me. This is nothing but misery. He was mad because I didn’t give him money. He threw everything my clothes my shoes boxes books all over my place everything is scattered. I was left to then clean it all up. I’m tired I want him to leave my place but he won’t leave. I have already taken off my marriage ring. I cannot call the authorities on my husband. But I don’t ever want to be involved with another Nigerian man again. I didn’t learn the first time. I am very miserable