Two days ago, we learned of the death of a world-renowned, American actor, stand-up comedian, film producer, and screenwriter. It was confirmed that Robin hung himself. Full story here. The devastating news didn’t only shock and sadden Hollywood, it hit the world, especially us 80s babies who grew up watching Robin on screen. How sad. He made the world laugh but fought and eventually gave into the demon of depression for majority of his career. How Ironic.
It not only highlights the fact that happiness can’t be bought by material things or worldly success, it brings to question what happiness really means.
Happiness? What does that even mean? Merriam Webster defines it as “a state of well-being and contentment”. Happiness is subjective. So, what’s more important is how you define it. By your job? Your relationship? Family? Money?
Sadly, this year, I’ve come across many unhappy people. In fact, it seems to me that I’ve noticed more unhappy people this year than I ever have. This may be because I have recently become sensitized to “happiness-detection”. or Not. Surprisingly, what I’ve seemed to notice is not people who are naturally unhappy but people who have slipped into unhappiness because of a deterioration of an aspect of their life; the declining job market, hard-breakups or status in life.
The reality is that life is tough. Its like a roller-coaster; unpredictable in its turns and immensely fast-paced. It’s like a train moving forward, if you don’t get on it, you’ll be left behind. If you fall off and fail to get back on, get ready to take a picture of its tail.
Happiness is a choice. Ultimately. While admittedly, being happy can be threatened or strengthened by the person you love, the people who love you back, your job and the amount of money you have, most importantly, its about your state of mind and what you choose to do with it. If God wanted your emotions to control you, He would have created emotions and put you in it. Instead, He created you and put emotions in you. Now, who do you think should be in control?
Often times, people keep waiting for happiness. Like it’d come riding on a white horse and sweep you off your feet. You say, ” when I graduate, I’ll be happy”, “No, when I get married, I’ll be happy”, “when my man stops cheating, I’ll be happy”, “When I make more money, then I can settle down, then i’ll be happy.” But then, what happens now? Look around. There are rich people who are unhappy. There are poor people who are unhappy. There are married people who are unhappy. There are single people who are unhappy. What this proves? That happiness is deeper than external factors. Its about YOU and your mind. Internal. Its contentment with what and who you have in your life now and the realization that the future will happen, whether or not you’re there to witness it.
Waiting to be happy is like waiting for life to be customized to you. It’ll never happen if you don’t make it.
Tough situations will always come. You’ll grow old and grey waiting for them to end. The thing about tough situations is that it gives you two options- dwell in it or get over it. The first option burns you to the ground because you literally waste your thoughts and emotions buying into “unhappy”. When you buy into unhappy, you end up pushing good people and good things away becuase you’re inadvertently focused on what could be and not what is. “Unhappy” likes being bought so it’ll give you a great deal. Stay away from that kind of sale.
If you want to be happy, here’s what to do, BE. Its all on you. Your choice. Its a conscious choice and never will be automatic. This is not to say that whatever situation you’re in will disappear automatically. it just means you reclaim your life. Doing otherwise is giving the “thing” (which could be a person) control of your life. Live now. Be you and love it all the way.
Here are a couple of my favorite quotes on happiness. They each speak gospel.
You need to learn to be happy by nature, because you’ll seldom have the chance to be happy by circumstance. ~Lavetta Sue Wegman
You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life. ~Albert Camus
It is not happiness until you capture it and store it out of the reach of time. ~Robert Brault
Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a manner of traveling. ~Margaret Lee Runbeck
Happiness involves focusing on God’s word. 1 Timothy 6:6- But godliness with contentment is great gain. Proverbs 15:13- A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit. Philippines 4: 4-Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice.” Psalm 37:4- “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Try counting your blessings. The fact that you’re still living means God is not done with you yet. Now, that’s happiness. Try to see the good in your life. You have a job? you’re privileged. Its also appreciating those who love you and loving them back. There’s happiness in loving.
Each minute you spend being unhappy, you loose 60 seconds of your life you’ll never get back. Stop waiting for something or someone to make you happy. Decide to be happy. Choose to stay happy. Most importantly, BE happy.
NwaVic – www.nwavic.blogspot.com | firstname.lastname@example.org |Twitter & Instagram @nwavicesq