Dairy Of A Great Jambite Lion [Part 8: A Well Rounded Education]


One of the great things about UNN is that you’re bound to get a solid education once you’ve passed through the 4 walls of that institution. What is a solid education? It’s what you learn both inside and outside of the classroom. Part of ‘uni’ life is experiencing new things, and learning different things everyday. That’s why the university environment gives a “well rounded” education.

But out of all the things I learned in my few years at Nsukka, none were as memorable and life changing as the one I got from a certain teacher one night.

Her name was Miss A… Well we’ll just call her that. She was in a  my group of friends. We all hung out in a sizable clique of peeps that were into entertainment, all the latest dance moves, clothes, movies, and all things vain. That was what connected most of us really. Some people nick-named us the Channel O children, but that’s besides the point.

Miss A had taken a liking to me, and even though I was never  really attracted to her, I kinda just allowed the flirting as I figured it was just harmless and general fun stuff. We were never together at the same place alone so I had nothing to worry about really… Well until one night. The night I was to get the first lesson in a well rounded education.

It was late. I’d say about midnight or so, and I got a random knock on my door. Usually a knock that late on my door can’t be good (see part 6 & 7). My roommates weren’t around so I was even more afraid of answering but after asking, I opened the door. It was Miss A, and she explained that she was stranded and needed a place to stay for the night. Her hostel was obviously closed, and okadas were not really flying that late at night on a weekday. She explained she came to see a guy she was talking to, and waited and waited for him and he never came back to his room. So she just decided to leave as she didn’t want to stay any longer especially cos his roommates were there.

Not exactly sure how this translated to coming to my room to spend the night, but I didn’t argue. She might actually be stranded. Who knows? I gave her a wrapper and told her she could go ahead and sleep, and I’ll continue doing some reading I had to do before going to sleep.

Eventually after an hour or so I turned off the lights and laid down on the mattress also and went to sleep.

Now I don’t know how to explain what happened next, but somehow I woke up slowly to an extremely pleasurable experience going on south of the border. If you’ve ever experienced this you’d know that it has no explanation. I opened my eyes slightly and I just saw what I had only seen in “blue films” before. Miss A was giving an award acceptance speech, and I was the mic. Yes she was rocking the mic, and boy oh boy that speech should have won its own Emmy Award. I was both in shock and ecstasy at the same time. “This can’t be happening to me. Ole Boy!! Nah so this thing sweet? Omo man.

When she realized I had woken up, she really went to work, and in X number of minutes, the glorious end came, and I was left laying down, looking at the ceiling thinking “This is the best thing in the world. How could this kind of thing exist and I wasn’t told before. Is this kind of extreme enjoyment even legal?

Now it’s not like I was a virgin or anything like that, but I was a virgin to that, and up until that moment I never understood why it was included as part of extra curricular activities. But now I’m a believer! I’m ready to make it a law sef!

For the next few months, Miss A became my favorite teacher at Nsukka. She liked teaching, I liked learning, and we didn’t have that other thing named jealousy in the picture.

You know how there are classes you take that almost cement what you want to do with your career? This class did just that for my extra curricular career. I knew at that moment.

So thanks to Miss A, and Nsukka, I had gotten a well rounded education in the University.