Looking For Mr. Right, or Mr. Right Now?


More often than not, you meet a young Nigerian babe in her early twenties and the only thing on her mind is “God please take away all this stupid, ‘yeye’, small boys from my path and bless me with a fine man, senior partner in shell or chevron any one would do, a nice house in lekki, phase I or phase II or even banana island  am not too picky, with a master’s degree , well mature, grown and not on  a ‘junior boy level’ “ .ARE YOU KIDDING ME !? There is a real good reason God hasn’t answered your prayers. Are you Mrs. Right do you think you are ready for a man who is set for life a man who has accomplished the “Nigerian dream” a man who can die happy. You need to assess yourself and ask “can I really handle a MR RIGHT?” Supposing you pray to God a million and one times a day for the perfect man and God being the merciful lord that he is grants you the perfect man, the whole package a man who would take you shopping and say “baby go crazy with my credit card” a man who would love you beyond life itself and you are Mrs. Carp, you are whinny, immature, arrogant, illiterate and every other thing that can possible be wrong with a young woman. What happens next? Mr. Right leaves you, find Mrs. Maybe and you are left all alone, cursing at the world asking God why he didn’t give you Mr. Right, well he gave you Mr. Right but were you ready? That is the real question.

As a young woman trying to find a man, you need to specify what you want with discretion. You don’t need a man with 3 houses, or a mansion, why are you asking God for a man with a private jet? Can you fly one? And why on earth are you asking for somebody that has an island. Most girls ask “why do you want me to lower my values to find a man?” Girl, that one is not values oh! Or standards, that one is corporate theft because “Na thief you be! “. I mean If you are  young, in college and you are not dying any time soon, you need to be asking for a guy that would love you, support you, help you advance intellectually, am talking about a guy you can grow with , not the one that you would have to tip toe around because you guys are not comfortable around each other , a type of guy that the two of you can see movies, go clubbing and share significant time for each other , and you never know Mr. right now, may eventually turn to Mr. right.

But if you Get a more mature and let’s say a perfect guy , that has a full-time job , works from 9am to 9pm, is always in one conference or the other , but loves you all the same , is stupidly rich and spends all the money on you . he is right up there  and you are so low compared to his maturity, as a young woman you will feel that you are well equipped to handle such a relationship but you are wrong, you are to have the emotionally immature  to keep up with such a relationship. Of course he is eventually going to leave you because you are a mooch , he is not gaining anything from you and there are millions of more mature women that have earned themselves a ‘perfect’ man like him . You need to STOP looking for the wrong thing in a man and the Wrong man would STOP finding you.

You hear a lot of women using the same phrase “guys around my age are too young for me” but then if you see a guy you that is ‘omo baba olowo’ (has a rich parent) he suddenly becomes you ideal man.  You need to look for people who have ambition, and a means of attaining their goals. But on the other hand if you a looking for a ‘Maga’ find Maga now, let him pay your way through college and buy you the flashiest things, but remember, you can’t eat your cake and have it, would ‘maga’ marry you?, ‘boys don dey sharp up’, be rest assured that he is using you as much as you are using him. So girls do you self a service, work hard for your money and work hard for the type of man you want to end up with. Once you’ve laid the right foundation it doesn’t take too long to get what you want. Don’t wait for anybody to give you what you can get yourself, Grow up with your man, and when you’ve reached a level where you feel he is becoming stagnant or has no passion then you can move of to man who has earned you, but if he is at your pace, the love is there and you guys have so much fun, then what are you looking for Mr. right for? , When he is right in front of you. Now he might be Mr. “please pick your underwear from the floor” or Mr. “why won’t you raise the toilet seat before you pee” but when you have a good man who is growing and maturing with you with time he would definitely be MR. RIGHT.

Image Source: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/mr.+right+now


  1. Nyc one babe,i also think babes shld mk dem sefs Mrs Ryt b4 lookin 4 Mr Ryt n'also bear in mind dat no one is perfect bt 2geda u guys cn b perfrect 4 each oda jst a mata of understandin.Ladies learn 2 knw a guy 4 his personality,attitude,xter n'goals in lyf instead of lookin at d external factors(cute charming guy,tall,sleek,porcshe car,house,fat acct balance etc) all these mata as well bt shldnt b ya utmost priority.Ok Enof!Am out,Much Luv y'all.

  2. A 9c posting here,really glad 2 b part of dose oppurtuned 2 read dis column.dey r all thiefs lik u rightly said,dey dnt want 2 wrk 4 anytin @ all,dey want wake up in d morning&find d world @ dere feet,want 2 cruise in d best cars,live in d best nd do shoping In UAE,I am tired 4 dem ooooo.“GOLD DIGGERS”dey end up dere lifes in misery

  3. so so onpoint…..frankly i wsh naija gurls wud reason lyk ds.i kw it wud go a lng way in curbin d high rate of marriage collapse we c nawadays.

  4. Lovely post. Some 9ja gals have started putting guys down. They wanna go for easy money (players, 419, etc) and overlook the hardworking faithful guy with a dream. What they don't know is that many of them will never get married or will marry wrongly. Look for a guy you can grow together, and both of you support each other (not sexually oooo). Never put down a good guy, even if you're not interested.

  5. Right on target girl!!!Well done! I think it’s about time we gals paid particular attention to the “I have a bright future guy”. Money alone never made a babe happy, no matter how much we want to believe it. For me, Fear of God, Respect, Friendship, Love and hardwork closes the deal. Yes, I mean it in the listed order. Once I saw that I would be happy growing old with my ” bobo”, my Mr Right Now became my Mr Right.

  6. Hmmmmmm,tell them ladies. SWAG will not pay the bill years from now. They wan chop their cake and have it. Want Mr ………Hope all the singles will read and learn. Nice writeup