What Is Your Expiration Date?



Recently I went to a get together – the usual Nigerian affair. A mingle of long weave, suggestive smiles and glances, primping girls and predatory males. I played the game of who’s slept with whom and who’s on the hunt again. Or better yet who’s NOT slept with whom – would probably take less time.  My demeanor was as usual noncommittal and slightly bored disguising my intense scrutiny. I quickly became bored with my game and turned for some idle chitchat with a reasonably attractive guy next to me. Soon I was praying my flirtatious smile was still on my lips and my eyes hadn’t glazed over. Before I gave up all hope and became a true sleepwalker a conversation sparked that drew my interest. My brain having checked out came back to attention excited to be back in action.  Ok I’ll be honest I would’ve desperately clung onto any debate for life support. At first the conversation was cotton candy stuff… who’s the prettiest vocalist… blah blah… fast forward >>>> So a guy starts up a complaint about women who wait until it’s too late to settle down. The typical she should’ve given the chump from her past a chance complaint. Whatever… What really caught my interest was when he said, “All women should know their expiration date”. Eh? Expiration Date? I’d never heard of that term applied to women. I already knew where he was going with this but I listened intently anyway.

So it turns out that from the ages of 26 to 30 women expire. My 26th birthday had just passed so you can imagine my feelings after hearing that. I rubbed my forehead as if my Sell By date was stamped there. Maybe my clock was going down over my head like in one of those V8 commercials. That’s when the ridiculousness of it all hit me. Me? Expired ke? RUBBISH! I confronted the guy:

“So when [THE HECK] do men expire?”

He looked at me like I’d asked the most foolish question he’s ever heard. He smirked “We don’t expire”. He even had the nerve to try to sympathize with women… saying it’s a sad but true situation. With a sympathetic glance at all the women in the room he left leaving us to chew or more like mangle his so-called “words of wisdom”.

I’ve thought about it since that day. Grudgingly I agree with the guy somewhat. In the Nigerian community by 30 a woman who is still on her own is seen as a stigma. Even now when I tell men I’m single and have been for some time I get “What’s wrong with you” as they walk away backwards. (Shrug… that is for another post). These days’ a lot of women have different priorities from women of the past. Where in the past building a family may have been at the top of the list now a career, financial stability, etc. may top it. I know personally I am more career and goal oriented, in the process of attaining my goals a man will naturally fall into place (lol I know I may be attacked on this point). Call me Americanized but the 30s are a woman’s best years… married or not I will live it up to the fullest. Only God can tell me when I’m past due.

However I do not agree that men don’t expire. All of us know of or have seen that “old guy” at the club or at parties. Trying to hit on the younger women and just looking like a doddering fool. My friend, come out from here JARE. You have passed your delivery date!


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  1. But he's right sha if you want to be objective. Men never expire. We can always have kids at 70 if we want. Women on the other hand by 30, that child bearing womb start loosing functionality

  2. In reality very few women over 30 that are unmarried are happy with the situation. They say they're happy, but really there are not and you can see the desperation in their eyes when eligible men are around.

  3. Oga, Its not about when you can have kids. Yes a 70 year old man with a 2 year old. I'm sorry it is not attractive. You will die and leave the child to be raised without a father. I know of men still clubbing at 40 and chasing 20 year olds. Sorry that is just disgusting to me. I mean being chased by a 40 year old. Shrug… Where did you miss the boat? So Yes men do expire.

  4. I think 21-23 is like the prime of a woman's youth, I better catch one while I still can! lmao, ANYWAYS there was a similar article on Bella Naija titled "What's Your Strategy" aka what is your plan to get married.

    I think both men and women get married later nowaways (like older than 25) so as long as you keep yourself attractive I don't see why you would "expire".

    I think the biggest challenge for women (and men) who wait too long to get into serious relationships that could lead to marriage is that it becomes harder to find suitable candidates.. not because they're not out there but because you won't catch them in the usual places (social events, clubs, etc). But I think if you travel/ move around a lot of different social circles you won't have any problem finding a mate.

    Apparently there are more men than women in Nigeria atm so does that mean we as women have the upper hand? Although I'm not in the "expiration" range, I don't really care to try and find a husband or whatever, maybe when the offers start dwindling I'll feel the prezzure lol.

    • there's no way that 21-23 is a woman's prime. she doesn't even know who she is at that point. i would say late twenties
      and i don't think that everybody's "prime" is the same age. ppl blossom at different rates.

  5. I am definitely feeling this post..very well written. I feel that the term "expiration date" is subjective. Honestly if you choose to believe you have a expiration date and then want to go on a desperate man hunt then to each his own. I, on the other hand choose to do me and wait on God's timing. And just because u r married before this "expiration date" does not necessarily mean you are happy. I would rather be single and lonely than married and miserable. My happiness trumps everything. With time comes wisdom and I need to know who I am before I know myself with someone else. There is no need to debate whether men expire or not. All I know is that a man in his 40s should not be talking to me cause that is not alright with me. Also the lastest research shows that Down's syndrome is actually linked with paternal age. So men DO have an expiration date. Just cause you can have kids at 70 doesn't mean you should. Think of the child's potiential genetic makeup. Sorry thats just the nurse in me talking

  6. lmao. This is funny. They make women look like milk in a box or something. Expired ko, expired ni. Men are just useless