If you’re unfamiliar with the idea around my topic, then you probably need to visit a buka and tell the owner you want to eat on credit and pay at a later time. He/She will probably point you to a sign that shows their only policy. Those that get it, get it.
Anyways, in one of my random moments, I got on the internet and stumbled across a pretty interesting video on askmen.com about the dreaded “friend zone” and signs that let you know that you wont be getting any nookie from this babe that you’ve been programming since 2008.
As someone that has languished in the friend zone a lot in my younger days, I can definitely identify with its pains. It can get pretty annoying, especially when you cant figure out why.
Here are some signs that you’re doomed, and you should just hang it up.
1. She always brings her friends when you guys go out: This is pretty damn obvious. The babe is not trying to see you on a one-on-one P, and will always try to avoid that so you don’t even have a chance to try anything. In most cases she already knows you like her, but she “sees you as brother” or “doesn’t want to ruin the friendship.” Bringing friends along with her anytime you guys make plans puts a stamp on that. She’s on the “Let’s all have fun together” P, which is obviously not what you’re on.
2. She brings up that word “Friendship” way too often: If a girl is attracted to you, and will give you some nookie, chances are she wont be mentioning that friend word too often. Words like homie, buddy, main man, aren’t necessarily words that scream, come and collect my pant. Instead it lets you know that she’ll probably come and tell you about a guy she just met the night before at Rehab.
3. She avoids possible moments of physical and verbal intimacy: This is closely tied to 1. It’s all about avoiding those moments where you can make a move. If she reduces the moments where you can make a move, then your chances are seriously diminished. Like one of my guys will say, “You cant score a goal if you can’t even get the ball.” Even time for hug sef, you’ll get that dreaded “side brother-in-Christ” hug. I don’t mean that any disrespectful manner, but in 2011 when a babe you’ve been programming gives you that kind of hug, it’s pretty much a wrap.
4. You’ve made all the moves with no response: This gets kinda tricky with African babes, and Naija babes in particular because they are notorious for forming for extended amounts of time. However, I’ll say this, if you’ve made a move on the girl, and she pushed you off or gave you this “what are you doing?” look, then maybe it’s not happening…EVER. More especially if she’s someone that has been your friend for a while. Yeah buddy, just fashi that romantic movie, and watch transformers.
5. She talks about her men, and dating experiences: This is probably the ultimate sign of the friend zone. She talks to you about Tunde, Chike, Uyi and co, and how this one did this, and that one did that. She’s only telling you all this because she sees you as a friend, and not much else. It’s not to make you jealous as some desperadoes might want to think. As someone that has been in the friend zone a lot, I know this is the ultimate sign. Most girls wont tell you about other guys, if they are interested in you. It’s counter-productive for them.
That’s pretty much it, and in reality if you’re going to get nookie from a girl, chances are you wont have to do too much. As one of my female friends once told me, “A girl knows if she wants to fuck you before you even say anything.” Everything else is just ceremony so it wont be as if you just went and collected without doing small something. Your job will be not to mess it up.
So if you’ve been programming a babe since secondary school, and still nothing dey happen, check these signs. You just might be in the friend zone, and be on the way to receiving the “side hug” lol… Yea I know it sucks. Desperate guys will resort to hanging around on the hope that one day she’ll finally realize that you truly love her…. Yeah… That’s just movies.