I was talking with a friend of mine who always seems to be caught up in different dramas every week. From people calling her a snob to calling her plastic and the likes. I’ve really gotten tired of her complaining about people calling her all sorts of names, so I asked her if she was really like that. Because to me she was completely different to what others labeled her, but I’ve gotten a lot of my other close friends say she’s a snob and stuff.
She then replied that she knows sometimes she can be really b*tchy and snobbish especially if she’s in a bad mood, but that’s just who she is and if people cannot accept her for who she is then she’s sorry she’s not ready to change for anyone.
After that, it got me thinking how we tend to justify our nasty attitudes with “that’s who I am and if you can’t accept me for that, then go and hug transformer”. I’ve heard countless people say that a lot. But seriously how do you want people to accept you with such a nasty attitude. You go around saying nasty things or acting stupid and you want people to just take you like that and smile with you? I mean are you really proud of yourself being stupid or nasty?
I don’t understand. People tend to criticize or bring your attention to something you are not doing right not because they are hating or because they enjoy bringing out your flaws, but because they want you to change which will end up being for your own good.
I mean if you are going to interact with people then I think there should be a way you act nice( for the lack of a better word) towards them. All that “that’s who I am” isn’t just the right way. I don’t think there’s any harm done to you if you act nice to people. There should be a limit to how nasty or stupid people should be towards others.
I remember how I was commenting on how nasty or stupid some Nigerian celebrities act on twitter and someone was telling me it’s just who they are and I’m like if you actually want people to know who you are then why spend millions of time or money trying to look good. Why spend so much on makeup and weaves just to look good. Arent people supposed to know the real you. It’s funny how we as human beings tend to focus more on portraying ourselves good with our looks and overlook our attitudes.
Granted the first thing you attract people to you with is your looks, but there’s also your attitude that most people are concerned with. Trust me no matter how sexy or fit or good-looking you are, a lot of people will eventually get turned off with your stuck up attitude. It is always the person within that is important not who you are on the outside. A good heart is always very important in building your relationship with others and that is what keeps people staying around you, that’s what builds a good and lasting friendship. Like someone said, “looks create attractions, but attitude creates connection” and to me building that connection is very important after attracting people towards you.
If you really want people to take you for who you are, then lose that weave, lose that makeup you have on your face and let’s see the real you. In as much as you spend time making yourself look good physically then to me I don’t think you should have any excuse why you have that stuck up attitude or why you tend to act like a fool sometimes.
If you keep saying you don’t care what people say about you, you would end up being really nasty because for the better part of it, you can’t really say what type of attitude you have unless people tell you unlike with your looks that you can see through a mirror and the fact remains that you “choose” to have that attitude and if people don’t tell you how you are, there’s no way you can change. You always have a control over how you act.
So my dear people, all that time you spend not caring about what people say, you can actually use it to change who you are. Even though we all know that you attract people first with your looks, they would always learn about who you are through your attitude and that’s what builds a relationship with people.
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