The Modification Game


In this game of relationships and what have you, how honest should you be with your partner?

The other day, the Oga Jaguda himself hopped on Verastic’s radio show and asked why women lie about certain things. One of those things included the number of sexual partners that a woman has been with.   According to Mr. Aribaba, if a woman tells you that she has been with 3 men, you should double that figure and assume that she has been with 6 men.

Well…here’s my 2 cents:

I believe that some women lie and modify their numbers because some men can’t handle the truth. If you guys truly were the open minded and non-judgmental creatures that y’all claim to be then I bet more women would be forthcoming about their pasts. I mean, imagine a scenario where you meet a woman who checks off everything on your so-called wifey list, and then the (dreaded?) conversation about past sexual partners comes up, in which she reveals that she’s been with 10 men. Now let’s assume that this woman is 27/28, so if you do the math and assume that she’s been sexually active since the age of 17 (best case scenario: 1 partner per year), why then do some of you men act all shocked? You instantly retreat and tell her that “ah, 10 men…that’s way too much”. In your mind, she’s been tainted…she’s been with too many men and is on that borderline ‘ho-status’. As you think your judgmental thoughts, you conveniently forget that at age 30, you average about 2-3 women/per year so let’s not even think about your numbers. You conveniently forget how you have been ho-ing around the state of Alaska, with different women.  It’s a tough world, you say…and the world is filled with double standards so while your ass is clocking 50 in the numbers game, you next a woman who has been with 10 men.

Hey, at least she was honest. So much for honesty, huh…

So, the woman learns her lesson, moves on to the next unsuspecting sucker who swore that he’d never marry a woman who has been with more than X men. So, when the question comes up this time around, she’s wiser and  quickly does a few modifications:

That Chinese guy in Alaska – subtract

The African American man in Houston – subtract

Those two Naija guys in London, and California respectively – subtract

Even the Naija guy in her zipcode who is pretty discreet, and doesn’t roll in the circle – subtract

Because, she’s wise and she knows that there’s no way in heck the man she’s seeing will find out. And abeg before you come at me with some nothing is hidden under the sun ish, save that for the next person. Some things stay hidden under the sun.  Now don’t judge her now and give her the side eye, thinking that she’s already started off her relationship based on a lie. He and she who is without sin should cast the first stone…
Sometimes a girl has gotta do, what she gotta do.

So, as you can see I’m definitely all for the system of modification if you think that your partner can’t handle the truth. Your sexual history doesn’t always define you. If a woman has been with X men, that doesn’t necessarily make her a ho/hoochie and all the labels that the world will reserve for her. Unfortunately, with a lot of guys it seems that once they hear X number…everything else fades into the background, and it’s a wrap.

So, to answer Mr. AriBaba’s question…that is why some women lie about numbers. I personally don’t get why people even want to know how many men/women you’ve been with in the past.  How does that affect the price of crayfish in the market? If you truly can’t handle the real answer, then don’t ask.
In the meantime, I will start claiming -3, for the number of men that I’ve been with. 😉

The usual disclaimers: Reading is FUNdamental for all. If you scroll up, you will note that I said ‘some’, not ‘all’. So ladies and gentlemen, this ish doesn’t apply to everyone. Some women will give you their tried and true digits, because for some…honesty is indeed the best policy.


  1. Very interesting calculation scheme… why can't we all just be honest…. heck if u stayed virgins like u should, there wont be need for this calculation? + okeke, -fela, – aminu… just close leg jare. *hiss*

  2. Wow… So this is how it works. Na wa o…and who is this Bush Girl babe… She's yarning complete dust. Nonsense.

  3. Well…Mgbeke, the truth & fact is that if a woman can't count the number of men she's been with in 1 hand, omo…wahala dey oh! And it sure does affect the price of crayfish in the market becoz advocates of head masters like us want to know an "estimate" of sugar sticks we may be unconsciously licking in the process!!! Talk abt double standards, the same way 2 men holding hands are GAYer than 2 girls kissing, that's the same way 10 & above earns a woman an ASHEWO award & earns a man a LAME & APPRENTICESHIP award.

    • Ha! Thank God i am reading all these opinions.

      One hand kwa? I.e 5 fingers.

      Seriously count to 5. 1..2…3..4…5, finish!

      And you think that is too much for a female that has a say 8yr sexually active history?

      I won't talk too much, i will never see the point of that question and for anybody that really wants to know, it shall remain 2.5. Yes, 2 and half!

  4. Bush Girl…carry your closed legs and waka dey go.

    Sanka, lmao! I think I've missed you. Still on that foolishness. Na you go marry woman wey don collect 50 men, and will lie and tell you that it's only 5 😉

  5. Yes Mgbeke… Thanks for calling me out ehn? Lol. With that being said, u already know where I stand on this. Just talk true… Cos the worst thing is if he by mistake finds out or u blurt it out one random time of walking down memory lane of college days.

    Now I can understand removing the chinese guy, and polish guy, but with naija guy that is discreet…not sure ooo… U just never know. That's cutting it close. Again… I personally don't believe anyone anyways, so if u like tell me 0, 50 or that u holy pass virgin Mary sef, that one nah for ur pocket… But anything u tell me the first time, if that number shifts somehow… That's it for me.

  6. I am not sure if modification is an issue here, but the woman really have to remember the # she gave when the question first came up. If you told me 5 today, then sometimes later the number changed–either decrease or increase— then alarm don raise be that o…

    Anyway sha, I think it is the quality of the woman that matters not her past sexual history…I say that because what if the girl was greatest girl u've ever been with and you found out she has been gangraped by more six men or more in the past?…I think it would be unconscionable/immature/crazy to next her…

  7. I dont care how many men she has been with along as her numbers are not more than mine and she isnt wide open…

  8. I'm a guy and I have a different mind set on these things.

    Don't ask questions you don't want honest answers to. It's crazy how guys want a chic with skills but don't want her numbers to be high. How you think say she learn all those moves? Practice makes perfect.

    Simply be the person you are looking for.

    I have spoken 🙂

  9. @ Bush Girl – I hate to break it to you,You will be too naive for your husband unless offcourse you have been educating your self (watching anf reading adult materials).

    Any ways Mizchif, I feel you gan!

    • There's something called learning… Do I need to be an expert before I get married?…Plus some of the so called experienced peeps still don't know a lot of stuff.

  10. Always thought relationship wasn't a game, so don't call it one.

    Guyz use chicks then cut back and scream for lack of virgins. Either we all have our guilty conscience. But 10 guys too much na, haba! Na wide open spaces. Also dating for lets says 8years and you both don't get married –phew thats not good. You probably won't learn nothing new in marriage or enjoy it as you have given your best love to another scammer.