What If?… Africans as Colonial Masters



What if?

I was talking to a friend a few weeks ago, and somehow our discussion got into colonialism in Africa , and how each and every colonized African country just can’t seem to shake off the effects of colonialism. A lot of times I sit and I think about how things would’ve been different if we were never colonized, or better yet if the situation were reversed. Like what if we were the colonial masters. Like…

What if Africans traded Europeans as slaves to other parts of the world?

What if we occupied an area in Europe and enslaved their citizens and made them second class citizens?

What if apartheid was in Switzerland ?

What if the Greek Kingdom, French Kingdom  and Spanish Empire were joined together to form a country called Mediterraia, and their national language was Hausa, while their local language was considered vernacular?

What if it was the Benin Kingdom that attacked and burned down Amsterdam to the ground, instead of the other way around?

What if the British were still begging and appealing for the Benin Kingdom to return their sculptures?

What if wearing Agbada was considered corporate attire?

What if Europeans all had a traditional wedding and “black” wedding to be considered officially married?

What if their men had to wrestle for their wives, instead of proposing with a ring?

What if European women spent a fortune on buying nappy hair cos it was more acceptable or it looked “better”?

What if there was darkening cream so that Europeans could “darken” their skin to be considered “more beautiful”?…just like we Africans bleach.

What if we all looked at them as inferior cos their skin is pale?

What if black was considered pure & good and white was evil and bad?

What if we had commercials all over Africa about saving the European child for just N10 a day?

What if Europeans were the ones always celebrating the firsts?… First white president, First European country to do this, first white woman to do x, y and z?

What if Africans took traditional religion to Europe on missionary work?

What if Europeans all had to learn Igbo or Swahili to be considered educated?

What if Europeans all had Fulani “middle” names, just like we all have Henry, George, and Sarah middle names?

What if Europeans worshiped Oduduwa and Amadioha?

What if Europeans spoke pidgin-igbo as a slang?

What if Queen Amina of Zaria was like the Queen Elizabeth Of England?

What if Europeans were the ones excited about hosting world cup for the first time in London ?

What if Europeans countries had to get their “independence” from their Zulu colonial masters?

What if Europeans all supported Eyimba FC, and shooting stars of Ibadan (football clubs) and lived and died by if they won or not?

What if Europeans fone’d their igbo cos it was cool to do so?

What if Europeans felt better about themselves if they were half-black? What if that made u socially finer?

What if eating eba and vegetable soup was considered as being classy, and eating pizza was considered local?

What if speaking English was local?

What if I was supposed to write this in Igbo for everyone to be able to read and understand?

What if they abandoned their culture to adopt ours so they can be considered as developing?

What if the 3rd world countries were in Europe ?

What if the tables were turned?

What if they complain about us all the time, and we looked down on them?

What if we were them, and they were us?

What if I never even had to think of the what ifs?

Often times, I can’t seem to not think about the what ifs. I’m not writing this because I feel we should revert back, or cos I have a solution or any answers. If I did, I’d be writing about the answers instead. Call it a moment I have every now and then, and I had to vent… but think about it though… what if?


  1. I have a feeling, the world would be much worse….Imagine if we were black supremacists….can ur mind begin to conjure what we might have done to the whites?

    • In all honesty, I don't think it'll be worse than what the white did to blacks in Africa, the Caribbeans and in America… they did a lot of evil things.

        • Wow! Aribaba this is truly inspirational and thought provoking. But I have to disagree I dunno if we would have done worse things, but we would at least have been just as bad. Firstly absolute power corrupts absolutely; and our leaders are prime examples of this. And looking at what we have done and continue to do to each other, unfortunately, I find it hard to believe that Africans would have shown more compassion 🙁

  2. We can only dream, right? Oh well…i guess this is where i insert the famous quote by Desmond Tutu: "When the white man came to Africa, he had the Bible and we had the land. He said, 'close your eyes and let us pray.' When we opened them, we had the Bible and they had the land." Shikena.

  3. if the tables were to turn around,i think blacks wont do half of what the whites did to us,because today in africa every nations problem was caused by the europians.

  4. Africans already did this, Olmecs from Mali area conquered Central America and educated them. Sub-sahara Africans conquered Sicily, Spain, Portugal and parts of Europe. The glory of the blacks a book by al jahiz http://www.amazon.com/Book-Glory-Black-AbuUthman-
    already elaborated on how blacks especially from Sudan dominated the middle east and educated the locals in math, science, moral, etc and these were done by in Europe also. Yea they enslaved the slavs in Egypt and other places and took their women as concubines,.

    Most of us seem to think that the presence of Africans in Europe is of recent times, though history shows otherwise. Africa had flourishing societies and highly developed cultures long before Europe, and of course people of Africa did travel and explore other continents. Black legions invaded Germany with Julius Ceasar, there have been discoveries in France, Spain, Italy, Denmark, Ireland, England and Finland, Scandinavia and as far north as the Arctic Circle. There were blacks among the Celts and Vikings, I have read some place that Thorhall the Hunter, Thorstein the Black and Halvdan Svarte (the first king to unite Norway) were of African origin (though I have not been able to have this confirmed by my Norwegian history book, it just says he was called Halvdan the Black, because of his black hair).

    http://www.cwo.com/~lucumi/runoko.html http://www.nationalmuseumofmexicanart.org/af/afrihttp://www.raceandhistory.com/selfnews/viewnews.chttp://stewartsynopsis.com/europe_conquered_by_af

    • But it is so sad these things are not as easily assesable as that of the whites conquering us, because that will just give us more power than we are suppossed to have.

      Will definately check out the book and the links

    • In other words, Africans would be MUCH kinder. I agree. Some anti-imperialist Americans are seeking to stop U.S. re-colonialization of Africa and her resources. Please publish news of anti-war news: France and U.S. out of Mali and Niger.

    • I agree with you. Like I mention it before, In the ancient civilization of Egypt, Blacks people from Africa were the ones that invented Mathematics, Architecture, Geometry. Just to name few of them.

  5. I was having this same conversation with someone about a week ago. I think to a certain extent, our problems are largely in the mind. We don't carry ourselves well and the world takes advantage of us.

  6. we African will depend so much in those first world nations if we fail to cease from that act for many year to come the statement we still be said by we Africans what if what if.

  7. I'd done whooping their asses and send them straight to the fields to pick cotton. Pick that cotton your nitwit, but nah… we Africans, we cooler than that. We'd rather hand you a chilled martini and joke about sex.